How Many Bridesmaids Should You Actually Have? Let’s Talk Real Numbers
The Average Number (But Don’t Let This Box You In)
Contents
- The Average Number (But Don’t Let This Box You In)
- Why There’s No “Perfect” Number
- What Actually Matters When You’re Deciding
- Can You Have “Too Many” Bridesmaids?
- What If You’re Worried About Hurting Feelings?
- Different Types of Weddings, Different Numbers
- My Honest Take on Odd vs. Even Numbers
- When One is Enough
Most weddings have around four bridesmaids. That’s what the data shows, anyway. In the UK, it’s closer to three. But here’s the thing — average doesn’t mean right. I’ve been to weddings with zero bridesmaids and weddings with twelve, and both were absolutely beautiful because they fit the couple. Your number should match your life, not some statistic.
Why There’s No “Perfect” Number
I’m gonna be real with you. The whole idea of a perfect number is kind of ridiculous. Some brides have one sister and two best friends from college. Others have three sisters, four cousins they grew up with, and a best friend from childhood. Your bridesmaid count should reflect your actual relationships, not what looks good in photos or what your venue coordinator suggests. Think about who you can’t imagine getting ready without on your wedding day. Who would you call if something went wrong? Who’s been there through your ups and downs? Those are your people.
What Actually Matters When You’re Deciding
Your Budget (Yeah, We Gotta Talk Money)
More bridesmaids = more expenses. It’s simple math, really. You’re probably buying gifts for each bridesmaid. Maybe you’re helping with dresses or paying for hair and makeup. There’s the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and all those little costs that add up fast. If money’s tight, having two or three bridesmaids instead of six can save you hundreds (or even thousands) of dollars. That money could go toward your honeymoon or that stunning bridal robe you’ve been eyeing for getting-ready photos.
Your Venue Size
This one’s practical but important. A tiny chapel with limited altar space can’t really fit eight bridesmaids comfortably. I’ve seen photos where bridesmaids are literally squished together because there wasn’t enough room. Not cute. On the flip side, if you’re getting married in a massive ballroom or cathedral, one or two bridesmaids might look a bit sparse. Walk through your venue (or look at photos) and visualize how many people can actually stand up there with you.
Your Guest Count
There’s kind of an unofficial ratio thing that helps. For intimate weddings under 50 people, one to three bridesmaids usually feels right. For mid-size weddings around 100-150 guests, three to five bridesmaids works well. For big weddings over 200 people, you could go up to seven or eight without it feeling overwhelming. But again — this is just a guideline, not a rule.
The Coordination Factor (This One’s Underrated)
Nobody talks about this enough. The more bridesmaids you have, the harder it is to coordinate everything. Dress shopping becomes a logistical nightmare. Planning the bachelorette party requires a group chat that never stops pinging. Getting everyone’s measurements, collecting money, scheduling hair appointments — it all multiplies with each person you add. I’m not saying don’t have a big bridal party. Just go in with your eyes open about the organizational work involved.
Can You Have “Too Many” Bridesmaids?
Technically, no. But practically? Yeah, kinda. I’ve seen bridal parties where the bride barely spent time with each bridesmaid because there were just too many people. The getting-ready photos were chaotic instead of intimate. The group dynamics got messy because not everyone knew each other. If you’re at a number where you’re thinking “wow, this feels like a lot” — it probably is. Trust your gut on this one. Most experts suggest keeping it under ten if possible, just for sanity’s sake. But if you genuinely have ten ride-or-die people in your life, go for it.
What If You’re Worried About Hurting Feelings?
This is the real issue for most brides, isn’t it? You don’t want to leave anyone out. Here’s what I’ve learned: people understand more than you think. Close friends know where they stand in your life. If you explain that you’re keeping the bridal party small and intimate, most people will get it. You can still include people in other ways:
- Ask them to do a reading during the ceremony
- Have them help with planning specific parts (like the bridal shower)
- Include them in pre-wedding events
- Give them special roles like greeting guests or managing the guest book
You could also get them a personalized gift to show you appreciate them even if they’re not standing at the altar.
Different Types of Weddings, Different Numbers
The vibe of your wedding matters too.
Elopement or Micro Wedding (under 20 guests):
Zero to two bridesmaids makes the most sense. Sometimes just a maid of honor is perfect.
Casual Backyard or Beach Wedding:
Two to four bridesmaids keeps things relaxed and manageable.
Traditional Church Wedding:
Four to six bridesmaids fits the formality without being excessive.
Black-Tie Ballroom Affair:
Six to eight bridesmaids can match the grandeur of the event.
Destination Wedding:
Keep it smaller — two to four bridesmaids — since you’re asking people to travel.
My Honest Take on Odd vs. Even Numbers
People stress about this way too much. “But what if I have five bridesmaids and he has four groomsmen?” Who cares? Seriously. Your bridal party doesn’t need to match perfectly. Bridesmaids can walk down the aisle solo, in pairs, or in groups of three. Groomsmen can stand however makes sense. Nobody in your audience is counting to make sure the sides are even. Focus on choosing the right people, not creating symmetry.
When One is Enough
You know what’s completely okay? Having just a maid of honor. No bridesmaids at all. This works especially well if:
- You have one person who’s clearly your closest friend or sister
- You want a more intimate, low-key vibe
